Recently I saw someone I know post on Instagram about a house they bought. Totally fine and obviously exciting. Getting a mortgage is pretty normal. I want to be able to pay a nice-sized down payment, but I will need a mortgage loan and I am okay with that.
A few months later he/she posted about buying a brand new truck. I was thinking alright that isn’t what I would do but it’s not my journey. Everyone on Instagram was commenting how exciting it was and how jealous they were. A month after that he/she posted about a new boat! Now I was just ready to lose it. Everyone else was still commenting how amazing it was and how jealous they were and I wanted to scream. I know their financial situation and I was getting so angry.
It was in that moment I realized how much my money mindset has changed during my journey to financial freedom. I bought a new car as soon as I graduated college because I thought it was the “adult” thing to do. I absolutely love my car but I will never buy a new car again (thankfully I paid it off last year). Of course, this is my opinion and you are entitled to your own. Maybe you completely disagree with me and that is totally okay. I used to dream about buying a fancy new car and having the nicest house. That just isn’t important to me anymore. One of my wishlist purchases is a boat but it will not be new (unless someone wants to gift me a new boat I will gladly take it).
I never want someone to be jealous of anything I purchase. If I buy a boat one day I want people to know it is because I worked my a$$ off and saved for it. I want them to know that I intentionally bought it after creating a budget, setting a savings goal, and working to get there. I never want anyone to be jealous of me, I want people to be motivated. I want people to see they can do it too. Your money mindset changes A LOT during this journey. Do I always stick to my budget? No. That is why I am trying new budgeting methods this month. If something isn’t working, don’t complain about it. Fix it. In the past, I would just keep doing what I am doing and complain to others how I am not sticking to my budget. Now I acknowledge when something isn’t working and I take actionable steps to change it.
Throughout your financial journey, you will continually encounter people who are not on this journey. People who continue to add to their debt, max out their credit cards, take out more loans, and spend money they don’t have. You have to realize you are on your own journey and some people don’t want to be saved. It is HARD. It is super hard to not voice your opinion. Maybe if it is a close friend or family member you can try to bring it up and maybe ask if they need help creating a budget. Most of the time they won’t want to listen because they know they are in debt and they don’t want to hear it. People have a difficult time asking for help. Sometimes as your money mindset changes you might need to delete people off social media and distance yourself from some friends. That is okay.
You have to keep pushing forward on this journey even if you are doing it alone. If you are alone, try to find a community. I am so thankful for the women in my community and most of them I met less than a year ago. When your money mindset changes but the people around you don’t change their money mindset it is hard. It takes A LOT of self-control. You will have to say no. People might make fun of you. They might tempt you more just to get a reaction. You have to be very focused on your goals and your WHY. Why are you on this journey? What are your goals? What are the actionable steps to reach those goals? Take some time to reflect on how your money mindset has changed.
I want to share a few quick tips on what to do as your money mindset changes:
- Find Community: You might already have a great support system and be surrounded by like-minded people which is wonderful! If you are not, it is so important to find a few people you can vent to, share your goals with, and ask for help. In my signature program, Flourish FinanciALLI, there is a private group & coaching calls so you can stay accountable and be part of a growing community.
- Keep Your Goals Visible: You probably know what you want to accomplish but keep your goals written somewhere you can view them every day. You can create a quick graphic in canva and then make it your phone or computer background.
- Declutter Social Media: Sometimes you just need to unfollow people who aren’t helping your journey. I am not saying unfollow everyone who disagrees with you (might be too many people haha) but if you find yourself always comparing yourself to a certain person or if their posts make you super angry, maybe you need a break from seeing those posts.
- Forgive Yourself for Past Mistakes: This one is the most important one. As your mindset changes, you need to be focused on what you can do now for your future not what you did in the past. Maybe you were like me and bought a new car. Maybe you got yourself in a TON of credit card debt. As your money mindset changes you need to forgive yourself and let go of the past.
- Don’t Judge Other Journeys: This one is really hard for me. As you can see above, it is hard to see people make money mistakes and not say anything. I have to continue to remind myself of how my money mindset has changed and how I used to think. I can just assume others should think like me. I can’t judge someone for where they are on their journey. I can only encourage them if they ask for help and focus on my own journey.
How has your money mindset changed on your journey to financial freedom? What has helped you stay focused on your goals?
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